Kim’s Vegan 5-Bean Chili

 

Kim’s Vegan 5 Bean Chili

Yields about 6 quarts of thick chunky chili - enough for now and plenty to stock the freezer for later.

3 carrots, chopped

4 celery stalks, chopped

1 medium yellow onion, chopped

2 glugs of EVOO

(1) 28 oz can crushed tomatoes

(1) 28 oz can diced tomatoes 

(2) 15 oz cans tomato sauce

(4) 15 oz cans kidney beans

(2) 15 oz cans black beans

(1) 15 oz can pinto beans

(1) 15 oz can chick peas

(1) 15 oz can navy beans

(1) 15 oz can corn

1 cup red quinoa 

1 Tbsp + 1 tsp garlic powder 

1 Tbsp + 1 tsp ground cumin

1 Tbsp salt 

2 tsp chili powder

1 tsp allspice

Crushed red pepper to taste (omit if you don’t like heat, I usually do because I’m feeding little kids, but always add it later into my own individual bowl)

Use a BIG 8 quart stock pot. Sautée the carrots, celery & onion in the EVOO in the bottom of the stock pot. Cook until veggies are soft. Add in all the rest of the ingredients. Simmer until the quinoa is cooked - a curly white germ will emerge from each grain and it will no longer be crunchy. Adjust all spices to taste. I find the primary spices I want to taste in this are the garlic powder, cumin and salt. Too much of the chili powder or allspice and it may end up tasting weird. Eat as-is or top with cashew sour cream, chopped onion, avacado slices & fresh or pickled jalapeños, maybe a squeeze of lime, and/or oyster crackers or Saltines. My hubby also likes it topped with shredded cheddar cheese. Enjoy!

*Note: if you want to use up some dried beans instead of canned beans, here are the dried bean equivalents…

A heaping 1/2 cup of dried beans = one 15-ounce can of beans. 

1 1/2 cups of cooked beans, drained = one 15-ounce can of beans. 

Carrot Lox Spread

I have this weird fascination with vegan food. I love turning a normal recipe into it's vegan counterpart, or tricking my family into eating a full plate of vegetables and legumes without them knowing it! Mwhahahahaha!!!!

The funny part is that I'm not even vegan. I just like the challenge. I do, however, think veganism is a great idea. I love animals and I understand the health and environmental benefits of eating a plant-based diet. Knowing my dinner hurts animals, pollutes our clean air and water and is probably giving me cancer and/or heart disease is not a happy thought. But, hey! I was raised Mormon! My people know how to "Turn it off, like a light switch!" If there are thoughts/ideas we don't want to confront, we just look the other way and focus on what we do like... like the taste of bacon... or real half and half in your coffee... or visiting teachers with freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.

I was raised on meat, and meat tastes delicious, and it's a hard habit to break. Part of the challenge for me is that I don't actually know enough quick easy foods to satisfy me that are vegan. I'm sure they're out there, but in my mind, they all require a lot of thought and planning and cooking and I need to be prepared for those emergency hunger moments where, "I MUST HAVE FOOD NOW!!!" My mind and my kitchen have not yet been trained to be ready for the vegan version of that. I do believe, however, that if I just keep adding vegan recipes to my culinary vocabulary that it is better than nothing. At least I'm eating plant-based meals some of the time, and, if nothing else, I'm getting a more balanced diet, which I think everyone agrees is a good idea.

So, with that said, I have created a vegan version of one of my favorite recipes. I've had this Ina Garten cookbook for years - Barefoot Contessa PARTIES! Ideas and Recipes for Easy Parties That Are Really Fun - and one recipe that I've used over and over is her Caviar Dip recipe. You can find it on the Food Network website here. Since salmon roe can be hard to find, I have often used loosely chopped smoked salmon instead. It makes a great addition to the brunch table or Christmas gift for any of your pescatarian friends.

Before I get started, let me first warn you that this entire recipe takes about 2 full days to complete!

I started with making the Carrot Lox in this recipe from Olives for Dinner. I have only made it once, and I was a little skeptical that it wouldn't be fishy enough, but, for some reason, the liquid smoke really does the job here. I will, however, try it again with less liquid smoke, maybe some smoked salt instead and some hijiki seaweed in the marinade to get that fishy flavor. But that's just because I can't help but mess with things!!! It's really an impressive smoked salmon substitute just as it is.

The vegan cream cheese was equally impressive to me, too. Here is the recipe from Yup, It's Vegan! You really do have to be patient with the cashews in the blender here. She says 5 minutes, but I'm sure I was sitting at that blender pushing things around for more like 20 minutes. I think the heat created by the motor helps release the oils, so just keep going until the motor gets hot! I ended up adding about a half cup of water to loosen it up. I used the So Delicious yogurt she suggested and the results were amazing! It is very much like real cream cheese with that same nice tang. I kept it on top of our radiator for about 24 hours and it seemed to be the perfect temperature. Keep in mind that we have water radiators, not steam, so they never get so hot that they can burn you.

So, now that you have your fake smoked salmon and your fake cream cheese you can make your awesome Carrot Lox Spread! See my recipe below:

1 full recipe of Olives for Dinner's Carrot Lox, chopped into 1/2 inch chunks
1 full recipe of Yup, It's Vegan!'s Cashew Cream Cheese
1 cup of chopped fresh dill
1/3 cup finely chopped red onion
1/4 cup nonpareil capers
lemon juice to taste
salt and freshly cracked pepper to taste (my husband felt no extra salt was needed)

Mix it all in a bowl until combined. Serve on toasted bagels or with crackers. Makes about 4 cups of spread. To be honest, I did not actually measure out things exactly as I made this recipe. I'm guesstimating, so really, every ingredient is "to taste." Experiment with the proportions until you find a combo you like. But, now you know the main ingredients: fake smoked salmon, fake cream cheese, fresh dill, chopped red onion, capers, lemon juice, and salt & pepper.

For an added treat, end this meal, or serve along side it, some pickled ginger, like they have at sushi restaurants. I found it in the Asian section of my grocery store. It cleanses the palate nicely after all that fishy smoke.  And you burp up nice ginger burps afterwards, instead of fishy burps.

One last note: I highly recommend this for any newly pregnant moms out there who are missing their smoked salmon. Who knew lox would be off the menu when you get knocked up!?

Enjoy!

To buy Theatre in the Mist pre-sale chicken dinner tickets for their fundraising dinner on September 10, 2015 click on the "Buy Now" button below.

Neat Balls

Last year I discovered an awesome vegan meatloaf recipe from The Engine 2 Diet. It turns out the base "meat" of this recipe is a great meat substitute in lots of other recipes, too. I love Italian sausage with spaghetti, so I decided to make a vegetarian version of it. I serve this with roasted spaghetti squash and our favorite store-bought tomato sauce for a killer veggie dinner. We have dubbed these faux meatballs "Neat Balls." Get it. Neat balls instead of meat balls. Silly, I know. Feel free to make name replacement suggestions in the comments below! Also, please note that these are a little spicy. They were too spicy for my 8 year old step-son. I like spice, but if you don't, just lessen or eliminate the cayenne and crushed red pepper. And, to make this a completely vegan dish you can just cut out the egg.

NEAT BALLS

(makes about 20 2-inch meatballs)

 

2 stalks celery, chopped

1 small onion, chopped (about 1/2 - 3/4 cup)
4 cloves garlic, minced or pressed

10 ounces firm tofu, drained
¼ cup walnuts, finely ground
1 1/2 cups cooked brown lentils
1 3/4 cups quick-cooking oats
3 tablespoons soy sauce
2 tablespoons ketchup
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard 
4 tablespoons dry red wine

1 teaspoon salt  
2 Tablespoons fennel seed  
1 Tablespoon paprika  
1 teaspoon crushed red pepper
1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper  
4 tablespoons fresh chopped parsley  
2 teaspoons freshly cracked black pepper 

1 chicken egg (or 4 quail eggs)

 

Sauté the celery, onion, garlic for about 5 minutes, until soft. Scrape into a large mixing bowl with the rest of the ingredients. Mix well. Form into 2-inch balls. Place balls on a parchment paper lined cookie sheet. Bake at 350º for approximately 30 min, or until toothpick comes out clean.

Birdseed Bundles

When I was a kid my mom used to make these amazing chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. When I got older I asked her for the recipe and she said it was just the recipe on the Quaker Oatmeal box with chocolate chips added! Brilliant, Mom!

The original Quaker Oats box top recipe.

 In recent years I have grown an affinity for making healthier versions of my favorite recipes. This was one such attempt that turned out surprisingly well. My goal was to make a breakfast cookie. Something that was a quick easy breakfast solution that I could grab on my way out the door and eat in the car without difficulty. My first few attempts were not good. They were the kind of health food that gives health food a bad rap. Nuts and twigs. Gross. That's when I recalled mom's oatmeal cookies! In my new breakfast version I altered the fats and the flours to contain slightly healthier choices and added in a bunch of high-protein, high-fiber mix-ins. The result was a delicious cookie that any health nut would be happy to eat!

The cookies do, however, have a lot of seeds and nuts, and thus they earned the name "Birdseed Bundles." (Caleb and I came up with several other humorous names for the cookies, including "Prairie Patties." I think you can see why "Birdseed Bundles" won out.) Hope you enjoy them as much as we do!

Kim’s Birdseed Bundles

7 Tbsp butter
7 Tbsp coconut oil
¾ cup firmly packed brown sugar
½ cup granulated raw sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
¾ cup all-purpose flour
¾ cup whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
3 cups Quaker Oats (quick OR old fashioned, uncooked)
1 cup semi-sweet Ghirardelli chocolate chips
1 cup sweetened dried cherries
2 Tbsp. millet
2 Tbsp. flax seeds
½ cup slivered almonds

1.    Heat oven to 350ºF. In large bowl, beat butter, coconut oil and sugars on medium speed of electric mixer until creamy.
2.    Add eggs and vanilla; beat well.
3.    In a small bowl, combine flours, baking soda and salt. Add to wet ingredients. Mix well.
4.    With a wooden spoon, mix in oats, chocolate chips, cherries, millet, flax seeds and almonds. Dough will be quite dry. A spoonful will barely stay together.
5.    Drop dough by rounded tablespoonfuls on to parchment lined cookie sheets.
6.    Bake 8-10 minutes or until light golden brown.Cool 1 minute on cookie sheets; remove to wire rack. Cool completely. Store tightly covered. Makes about 4 dozen cookies.

Kim's Pickles

I made these from a combination of recipes and they turned out awesome. Here's the final amalgamated recipe. More than one person has told me they are the best pickles they have ever had.

Kim’s Pickles
(makes 2 quart jars of pickles) 

12 pickling cucumbers

Cut pickles and place them in 2 quart jars. 

Brine:

½ cup white vinegar
3 ½ cups water
2 Tbsp pickling salt

Warm brine in microwave for 2 minutes. Stir until salt dissolves.

Add the following to each quart jar:

4 cloves of garlic, cut in half
8 sprigs of fresh dill
1 tsp coriander seeds
½ tsp mustard seeds
½ tsp whole peppercorns
¼ tsp red pepper flakes 

Top off cucumbers and spices with the brine. Close jars. Leave jars on the counter anywhere from 3-7 days to naturally ferment. Once they have reached the desired amount of fermentation, keep them in the refrigerator. Enjoy!

Updated 11/19/14 from 2 to 4 cloves of garlic and from 4 to 8 sprigs of dill.

Poached Eggs

It's 11:00 AM on a Tuesday. This is about the time of day that I get hungry and start trolling through food blogs and recipe sites. I just saw a post on my favorite food blog, 101 Cookbooks, about a dish with black rice and poached eggs. Now, something you should know about me is that I love poached eggs.

When I was a little girl, my Grandpa Butterworth taught me how to make a "6-Minute Egg." He brought a pot of water to a boil, and gently lowered 2 eggs down into it. He set the egg timer for 6 minutes, and pulled them out just when the time was up. He put one on a plate for me and one on a plate for him. While the egg was still hot, he gingerly carved it in his hands. With one chop he sliced right through the shell and cut the egg in half, then he scraped the bright orange treasure out of each half with a quick swirl of the knife. He cut it into little bite-sized pieces and sprinkled it with salt and pepper.

This was the best egg I had ever tasted in my life up to that point. Probably mostly because it was made with such love and attention by my Grandpa just for me, but there was more to it. The white part was fully cooked, and the yellow part was perfectly half solid and half liquid. You could tell that Grandpa had gotten very scientific about this process. He told me he had tried boiling eggs for 5 minutes or 7 minutes, but 6 was just perfect. And he was right. A simple egg, so delicious.

Before and since, I have tried lots of other kinds of eggs that I just did not prefer. You see, fried eggs are, well, fried, and that's not as good because of the oil. And, honestly, I don't like the way the texture of the whites can quickly get so tough when they are fried. It feels almost like eating plastic wrap. I don't like runny yolks, because, well, that's gross. But, you don't want it so well done that it's dry either. And there's no question, the white part absolutely must be fully cooked. Scrambled eggs are good. I especially like them with cheese, but if I'm going to eat just simply an egg, I have learned that there is only one improvement to be made on Grandpa Butterworth's 6-Minute Egg. And that is poaching.

You see, when you boil an egg it gives the perfect consistency, the only challenge then becomes how to get your boiling hot egg out of that boiling hot shell. There's the chance of burning your fingers, and even if you find a way to avoid that, there is then a chance you will get flecks of shell in your egg or, heaven forbid, that you will not get the complete egg out of the shell. Even with a spoon you don't get that perfect round end product. It comes out in jagged pieces. Yes, the only way to improve on Grandpa's 6-Minute Egg is to poach it. This eliminates the shell altogether, while still giving you that perfectly cooked consistency that I experience with Grandpa's egg.

Poaching eggs is not hard once you know how to do it, but as I've learned, there are lots of ways to screw it up. First, start with fresh eggs. The fresher they are, the better they hold together. Then, add just a splash of white vinegar to the water. It helps to coagulate the egg. The main trick is to be gentle. The water must be steaming hot, but must have no bubbles, or next to no bubbles. The bubbles will break up the egg and give you basically, egg drop soup, which is delicious, but not what we're looking for here. The water must be still, and gentle on the egg, like a sleeping baby you don't want to wake up. I usually bring the water to a boil, and then turn it down until there are no bubbles. Then, you must crack the egg into a cup or ramekin and then gently lower it into the water. I like to use a coffee mug, because the handle keeps your hand safely out of the boiling hot water. There should be no haphazard tossing the little embryo right into the pot. Be gentle. Entering the egg just along the side of the pot helps hold it together, too. 

I have found that cooking the egg in the water for about 5 minutes gets the yolk half cooked, just like grandpa's egg. (No shell = less cooking time.) Actually, another nice thing about having no shell, is that you can actually pull the egg up out of the water with a slotted spoon and feel how done the yolk is. If it's hard, with no give, then you have fully hard boiled it. If it feels really squishy like a ziploc bag with water in it when you touch it, then the insides are really squishy too. If it has body, but still gives a little, it's perfect.

When the eggs are done, remove them from the water with a slotted spoon. Place them on a paper towel, or clean kitchen towel and gently pat their tops dry. Many chefs forget this step when I order poached eggs in restaurants, and it is awful. It creates a big pool of water on your plate. Even if they serve them in a ramekin, I end up having to use all my napkins to dry up the puddle underneath them. After that, some people cut off the angel-y bits that sometimes occur around the edges, but I never do.

Now you have a perfectly cooked egg, no burnt fingers, no shells in your yolks. I still like to slice it into bite-sized pieces and sprinkle it with salt and pepper just like Grandpa Butterworth did all those years ago. I think of him every time I eat it that way. Nowadays I usually have my eggs in Eggs Benedict or some other brunch-y dish, with a nice mimosa on the side.

Happy poaching!

The Recession

I have a friend. Let's call her "Francesca" to preserve her privacy. This year I watched Francesca struggle to find work. She searched for months without luck. After a while she was unable to pay important bills like her car payment and utilities. She was only able to continue paying her rent due to family and friends that were sending her money. It was scary to watch. Like she was slowly falling off a cliff and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Towards the end she thought she was going to have to live in her car. It was a bad time for her. Finally, she found a job, and now she is catching up and getting back on her feet. Watching her struggle to find work really made the news hit home. We are in a recession.

Luckily, I have never had trouble finding work. Perhaps that is due to the fact that I have very low standards for myself when it comes to jobs that I will take. I am not beneath doing retail at the mall, temping in an office, waiting tables, cleaning houses. I have unique skills that I can market independent of a company such as sewing, teaching voice lessons, organizing people's homes, singing in a band. Also, I am a trained actress, and I have had great luck finding work in theatre and television. Plus, it hasn't hurt me that I am still young-ish, my figure is still at least "average", and some would say I'm kind of pretty. I have been blessed to always have work. Granted, I'm not out there looking for a CEO job, or some specialized skill job like a doctor or an attorney, but perhaps in this recession, that has worked to my advantage.

A few years ago I read the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. Before I go into this, let me say that the Rich Dad, Poor Dad organization promotes a get-rich-quick scheme. Just know that, in case you were thinking about reading the book or going to any of their "free" seminars. That being said, I learned a lot about economics from the book and I would still recommend reading it. The story is that the author's father was poor, and his friend's dad was rich. His friend's dad became a mentor to him in his journey towards becoming a successful entrepreneur. The main thing I took from this book was the fact that, in general, it's the bosses that get rich, not the peons. It's the people that take that risk of starting a business that get the greater reward in the end. Of course, there was a lot more to it besides that, but this idea really stuck out to me. He also brought up the question, why does that business owner owe a job to his workers? They have the same opportunity to go out there and start their own company. That's how a capitalist system works. It's something I had never considered before.

Of course, one wants to be a moral person, a fair employer. I would bet that most of the world's CEOs want to do right by their employees. However, in reality we are all self-serving. That is our human nature and that is why democracy works. We all vote for the person who will serve our interests the best. Then, whoever is voted into office (theoretically) represents the interests of the majority. The fact is, that if a company is not making enough money, the employer cannot afford to retain so many employees. It's not personal, it's a mathematical fact. And that's why my friend Francesca was out of work.

I was inspired to write about this today when I read this cartoon. A professor at my old university had posted it on Facebook. I don't watch the news really ever. I get most of my information about the world from NPR on my commute to and from work, so I didn't know what the reference to Frances Fox Piven was. I looked it up and found this article, which is shocking in itself. Then I linked from there to the article in reference by Ms. Piven.

I must say, I had mixed feelings as I read her article. I am a Democrat. I think President Obama is the best president ever. I am in favor of socialized health care. However, I think I have a touch of entrepreneurial spirit within my soul, and hearing unemployed workers whine brings a few thoughts to the front of my brain. Number one, why does our government owe you a job? Why does any other hard working business owner owe you a job? They worked hard to get where they are, and just because their path was profitable and yours was not does not mean that they owe you a job. Why don't you create a job for yourself instead of depending on someone else to do it? And, in a sense, I guess that is a Republican way of thinking, which makes me feel strange inside to say because most things about the Republican party rub me the wrong way.

I guess, if the government is creating an atmosphere that is unfriendly to businesses and business owners, that is a problem, because, in a sense, then the government is preventing the success of it's own people. But our country has a deficit to pay off, and that is going to hurt, no matter what. If you had a credit card to pay off, your life would suck a little more while you gave up fun things in order to pay off your balance. So, how do we solve this problem? How do we pay off our deficit and not put our money-makers out of business? We can't sacrifice to pay off our debts and not expect life to suck at least a little. But, it gets so jumbled when it's on such a large scale. These characters of The Government and Big Business and Unemployed Workers take on sort of vaudevillian roles in the stories the news tells us.

If this were a small village of 20 people perhaps things would be clearer. We would all do our part in our little community to keep everyone fed and clothed. Then, one day lets say we decide it would be a good idea to have a water well so that we don't have to carry water from the stream into the village. Ok, so we all contribute a little money (taxes) and get a well built. This makes our lives much easier. Everybody loves the well. Now, however, we have to maintain the well. This will require each of us to pay a small amount every year (taxes) in order to keep it running. No problem! We're all glad to pay, because we are glad to have the easily accessible clean water.

Now, let's say we all decide we want electricity in our village. It's going to cost more money than we have in our pockets to get it installed, so we borrow some money from the village next door. We agree to make payments to them (in taxes) until it's all paid off. Now, let's say that our whole village earns their money from wheat crops, and there's a bad storm that ruins 50% of our harvest. We can't afford to feed our families, and there's not enough money to pay for well maintenance and the electrical payments to the village next door. What would our little village do in that scenario? It's an important thing to examine, because that's the state that our great country is in. We owe the countries next door lots of money and we haven't had the economic success that we were hoping for. Our government is us. We are our government. It's not like "They" aren't serving us well. "WE" aren't serving us well. This is our country and sometimes things just happen that we're not prepared for.

It is hard when people don't have jobs. There are all kinds of complicated social injustices I think we would all like to solve. But this one, the economy, is so complex. I can't give you a job if I don't have enough sales to pay you from. Our government can't provide services when it doesn't earn enough in taxes to pay for those services. If this was our little village of 20 people I think we'd go without a little bit more, and maybe create some new forms of revenue that are more appropriate for the climate. Maybe we'd start raising sheep for wool or chickens for their eggs. In a real family, or in a small community like that, you just get creative and adapt as the problems are thrown at you. On a larger scale, that's what we're going to have to do, too. I hope it's that simple. I hope there aren't corrupt politicians out there trying to take advantage of the helpless, or evil villian CEOs twisting their moustaches and plotting the country's demise. I hope there aren't. I really, really hope there aren't. And maybe if we hope hard enough we'll all make it out of this alive.

Priorities

My boyfriend is an animator. He is also a work-a-holic. He has a full time job, but he also takes on lots of freelance work illustrating children's books. He almost always has some project on the side that he is working on. He has spent the last 3 Christmas vacations in a row doing freelance work.

Right now he is at the end of one doozie of a project. Last night he pulled an all-nighter. I worry about him. I worry about his health. He can't go on treating his body like that and expect to live a very long healthy life. He gets so stressed. Not only that, but I pretty much only get to see the back of his head in front of a computer screen for months at a time whenever he's doing these extra jobs. It sucks.

This morning, a few hours after he texted me to tell me that he was finally going to bed (at 6:00 AM), he told me that he had gotten an offer to do character design on a new project that he was really excited about. But he was torn because he still wasn't done with the project he was currently working on, and he wasn't sure he'd have the strength to do it. The project's director is a good friend of his, he really respects the studio he'd be working with, and the cartoon was created by an artist he really likes.

You know, I'm a performer. I understand what it's like when someone offers you a project like that. It's hard to say no. You feel like this opportunity may never come your way again. That you must take it now! Even if that means that you won't sleep for the next 2 months, and your girlfriend and son will only catch glimpses of you when you have completely worn yourself out from working so hard, and you have to take a break or your eyeballs will pop out. I understand that. I really do. But I am a girlfriend who is jealous of the time my boyfriend spends working on that second job. I would like more free time with him, and it really got me thinking about balance and priorities.

In my quest for wisdom I, of course, turned to Facebook. I asked my 599 friends: "...what order of priority do you think these 4 things go in: self, child, work, partner?" I got such a variety of answers. It was actually very interesting. Lots of people put self first, which is often what we're taught growing up in America, I think. Just like they say on the airplane, you have to put on your breathing apparatus, then the child's.

Some people said the child came first, but it really depended on how old that child was. The younger they were, the higher on the priority list they seemed to go.

One person tried to justify that his partner gets much better quality time, while his work gets much greater quantity of time. That really made me think. I mean, that is how most of us are, but perhaps that behavior doesn't really line up with our true values. I think if you ask most people, they will say that their partner is much more important to them than their job is. But, if that's the case, then why do most of us end up spending 8 hours a day at work and only 4 of our waking hours at home with our partners? Why is our society like that? Are there places on the planet that are different? What would that be like?

One person said that self and partner were equally important, an answer I think that only could have come from a woman. The female brain is wired to multi-task. Someone told me once that women put their love at the center of their world and their life has to fit in around it, and that men put their life at the center of their world and love has to fit in around it. I'm still trying to assess whether or not that is true, but so far I think it is. It's a fundamental perception of the world and organization of priorities that should really be evaluated as you attempt to solve problems with a member of the opposite sex.

A couple of people put partner before child, which I thought was very interesting, and I think I agree with. I believe that one of the greatest gifts you can give your child is two parents that love each other. In order to maintain that relationship, I think you really do have to make a conscious effort to put your partner's needs above the child sometimes. Otherwise, your relationship will whither and die.

Really, I think that it's a trick question, though. Any one of these things is so important that none can ever be neglected without bringing unbalance, and therefore, dissatisfaction into your life. You have to pay attention to all of them, with all of yourself, at all times, ("... and in all things, and in all places, as we strive to live the young women values.") It's an impossible juggling game that we are all trying to navigate on a moment to moment basis.

You can't neglect your child, or you are a bad parent. They might get hurt, or grow up ignorant and with bad manners. You can't neglect your partner, or they will leave you, or even worse, walk around the house treating you with disdain for years on end. You can't neglect your job, or they will fire you, and then you will have no place to live, and no food to eat, and as a result, Child Services will take away your kids. And you can't neglect yourself, or your partner will not want to be with you because you are stinky, your kids will not want to be around you because you drink too much, and you will get fired from your job, because someone younger and skinnier and more rested will do the same thing you can do for less money.

So, it's a trick question. You have to find balance between them all. Your children, your partner, your job and yourself. If you are not taking time out of your life for all of them, then you must stop, take a deep breath, and re-evaluate. Otherwise, Life will show you, and you don't want that, because Life's a bitch, and she'll make it hurt.

Chunk

When I was a kid my mom used to make this yummy dessert called "O'Henry Bars." It was these crunchy, chewy, chocolate-y bars and they were totally rich and addictive. When I went off to college this became a periodic treat I would make for myself and my roommates. It was always a winner, the star of any pot luck or buffet table.

In 1995 I went to spend my second summer in Jackson Hole, Wyoming to perform at The Grande Teton Mainstage. We were doing The Pirates of Penzance and Fiddler on the Roof . I was playing one of the General's Daughters ("Kate") in Pirates... and "Chava" in Fiddler... The summer was chock full of good times. We were at the foot of the Grande Teton National Park, only an hour's drive from the entrance of Yellowstone and a stone's throw from the Snake River. The cast was a bunch of young, loud "theatre people" all living together in a 4-bedroom apartment right next to the theatre. It was one of the best summers of my life. While I was there I met Christie and Kirt. We became fast friends, and they are still two of the most important people in my life today.

Seeing as we were all young, with fast metabolisms, most of us gave no thought to the idea of counting calories or watching our weight that summer. It was common to find several cast members in search of a midnight snack after the shows. We would walk over to the only late night grocery store (a.k.a. the gas station down the street) to buy a pint of Häagen Dazs ice cream, one for each of us. They would all be completely consumed in one sitting, and right before bed no less! How we didn't all gain 20 pounds that summer, I'll never know!

In addition to our Häagen Dazs habit we also gained a "Chunk" habit. That's what my mom's O'Henry Bars were dubbed that summer. It was called "Chunk" because it's like a big chunk of gooey goodness on your spoon, we wouldn't wait for them to cool, so you had to eat them with a spoon. And it was also called Chunk because it made you chunky, as in jiggly thighs chunky. Still, to this day, the cast members from that summer call my mom's O'Henry Bars, "Chunk."

So, this is the recipe for my mom's famous "Chunk." I'm not sure where she got it from, but it was probably some nice Mormon woman from Relief Society in the Raleigh First Ward.

O'Henry Bars

1/2 cup white sugar
3/4 cup white corn syrup
3/4 cup peanut butter
3 cups Rice Krispies

1 cup bittersweet chocolate chips
1 cup butterscotch chips

Heat the sugar and the corn syrup in a saucepan until dissolved. Boil for one minute, and remove from the heat. Add the peanut butter. Once the peanut butter is fully incorporated, then stir in the Rice Krispies. You don't want to wait too long for this step or the corn syrup mixture begins to harden and it becomes very hard to mix in the Rice Krispies. Pour into an 8"x8" square pan, or if you don't have that size pan you can shape it into a 2" flat disk on a dinner plate. That's what we did in Jackson.

Melt the chocolate chips and the butterscotch chips together either in a double boiler or in the microwave. In the microwave, cook them for 30 seconds at a time, stirring after each round until the chips are just melted. You don't want to overcook the chips or they get little crunchy burnt bits in them and your delicious creation will be ruined. Spread the chocolate mixture over the bars.

The recipe then says "Cool and cut into small squares." But you can also immediately take a spoon to it and begin gnoshing. Warning! These are addictive! Hope you enjoy!

Kim

Garlic Soup

Right after college I worked as a performer on cruise ships for about 5 years. 2 of those summers were spent touring Alaska. That's where I discovered one of my favorite restaurants of all time, "Ludvig's Bistro." It's a little hole in the wall in Sitka, Alaska, and it's named after the chef's dog. They serve rustic mediterranean fare. Some of the most wonderful, simply delicious dishes I've ever had.

I remember sitting in a window seat at the restaurant one day watching the bay. I watched this fisherman walk with a giant salmon in his arms from his boat, into the restaurant, where he plopped it down on the counter. The chef paid him for the fish and promptly started preparing it in the kitchen. Talk about fresh seafood!

One of my favorite dishes (actually they were all my favorites, I literally tried everything on the menu) was the "French Garlic Soup." It was a variation on French Onion Soup, only made with garlic. It was a homemade clear vegetable broth made with veggies and herbs. Then, they added in a ton of whole cloves of garlic, which simmered in the pot with it until they were soft and mild. Then, a big piece of crusty bread was placed in the center of the bowl and a hunk of gruyere cheese was melted in the oven over the top. This soup was to die for, and it is so good for you too. Garlic does all kinds of wonderful things for the body. This weekend I discovered that this soup is the cure for the common cold.

So, here's my attempt to copy the recipe. My boyfriend made the suggestion of cutting the bread up into little croutons to make it easier to spoon up. I tried it on a second batch I made last night and it was a great addition.

Kim's Imitation of Ludvig's Bistro's French Garlic Soup

4 cans Swanson's Vegetable Broth
about 3/4 cup white wine
3 bulbs of garlic, skin and tough ends removed (about 30 cloves. It should almost cover the bottom of a big soup pot)
olive oil, a generous dash (about 2 Tbsp.)
crusty French bread
gruyere cheese

Put the broth, the wine, the garlic cloves, and olive oil in a big soup pot. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer at medium low to low for about 40 minutes to an hour, until the smell of the soup has become mild and the cloves are soft and easily mushed. Next, cut the bread into cubes. Put in oven at 350 degrees for about 5 miutes, then turn them over, top the croutons with grated gruyere cheese. Put back in the oven at 350 degrees for about 6 minutes or until the cheese is just melted. Ladle the soup, cloves and all, into a bowl. At the restaurant each bowl was served with about 4-5 cloves in it. Top with the cheesy croutons and eat while it's hot.

Enjoy!

Thank You, 2010!

You know that song, "Thank You, India" by Alanis Morrissette where she thanks India for what she learned there? I'd like to do the same for the year 2010. "Thank You, 2010!"

Last New Year's Eve I had just barely moved to Los Angeles, so the year 2010 kind of feels like my 1-year anniversary for living in L.A., even though it's not. This is my first full year in The City of Angels, and it has been a full one. I've gone through a lot of ups and downs, but overall, I seem to have come out on top.

The things I remember about this year. Well, this year my Grandpa and Grandma Butterworth died. That was very sad, but at the same time it makes me very grateful to have such amazing people in my family. They were a solid example of how to be a married couple and how to just be good people in general. Perhaps the greatest blessing that came to me due to my grandparents' death was that we essentially had 2 family reunions on that side of the family this year, which never happens. It was wonderful to reunite with them, because they are all really cool people and we never get to see each other. We all still miss Grandma and Grandpa very much.

2009 was the year that I was reunited with My Long Lost Love, Caleb, but 2010 was the start of our "happily ever after." You see, the fairy tale (or the Hollywood script) usually ends when the couple is reunited, but as we all know, life goes on, and in reality, most of life is like act 2 of the musical "Into the Woods." It was a tough year of discovery for both me and Caleb, but after one whole year, we're still together! And, we still love each other. In many ways he is still the prince I always knew him to be. There have been lots of happy surprises, a few not-so-happy ones that I didn't know if we would make it through, but in the end, I think the essence of what makes him HIM still fits quite nicely with the essence of what makes me ME, and that continues to make life lovely.

This year I met Max. Max is Caleb's son. It was a big deal to meet The Boyfriend's Son. I mean, if things don't work out with a boyfriend, you just move on and get a new one, right? But with a child, a CHILD, you just don't want to mess that up. You want to be dependable and stable for the child. You don't want to ever disappoint them or you might screw them up for life. So, meeting Max has been a big deal. I think being around Max had an added note of importance for me because I don't have any children in my life. Well, I didn't before Max. No nieces, no nephews, no friends around with babies. I had no kids in my life, so all of a sudden having Max around was really different.

Turns out hanging out with a 4-year old all day is exhausting! I have a whole new respect for parents, as well as child care workers, and stay at home moms!??? Game over. You guys get the prize. It's a lot of work. It IS a lot of work, but it can be so fun too. The other day me and Caleb were just tickled as we sat listening to a recording of Max's little voice singing "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer," and I said to myself as we shared that moment, "Ah, THIS is why people have kids!" Max is a great kid and I'm so lucky to have him in my life. It is a beautiful thing when you love a child and they love you back.

This year I gave up my acting career. And it absolutely was the right thing to do. I'm not sure yet what will fill it's place. Perhaps cooking and gardening, even writing have already filled it's place. I went to see the Broadway touring company of West Side Story with a friend the other night at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood. Normally, in the past, I could not help myself but to imagine how I would have played that role, or said that line or done that dance step. But this time I had no pangs of jealousy or desire to be on that stage. Now, I just watch and enjoy. It has been very freeing. I don't beat myself up anymore for not being in a show. I have a busy life. I work a full time job and I have a 4 year old to spend time with 3 days a week. That's enough for me right now.

L.A., The City of Los Angeles, it is a curious place. I have learned in the year that I have been here where I fit in and where I don't. The traffic still sucks here. The climate and the beach are still great. Really, the city has been a character of her own that I have gotten to know. I have learned her streets. I don't need my Thomas Guide map book to get around anymore. In general, I don't even need Google maps. I know my way around. I know where to find good brunch. I know a few fun places to go and I've made a few friends. I understand the place I live a little bit better than I did last year, and that is actually making a big difference in my happiness here.

I know now that you don't live on the east side and try to commute to the west side. It's a commute that has brought me to tears too many times this year. You've got to live near where you work in this city or the traffic will eat you alive. Also, having roommates is a great way to make friends. Otherwise, it will take you a very long time to make close friends here. People do what I call "the L.A. flake out" where they tell you they will meet you somewhere, then they back out at the last minute. It's really not their fault (ok, sometimes it is) but for the most part the traffic is a big deterrent to getting together with people. Once people are home from work, they tend to not want to go out again. Especially after a 2 hour stop & go commute.

As of right now, L.A. is not what I would call "home". I mean, some people come here and love it immediately. I did not. It's a hard place to live unless you have a good reason to be here, like your true love or the entertainment industry. Wait, no, even then it's still a hard place to live, you just have a reason to live in it. If I was to move I would probably go north of LA somewhere, like Santa Barbara or up in the Sequoias, just somewhere outside of this concrete jungle. For now, though, I have found enough little pockets of good that I end up liking it here more than I hate it, and that will do just fine for now.

So, next year. What will next year bring? The first thing that pops into my head is gardening and cooking, writing and sewing. I see a small collection of hobbies in my life that I hope will bring good things to me and the ones I love. I may move to Buffalo, NY this year. It depends on a lot of factors, but I suspect next year's new years eve will be a much snowier one if that is the case. This year I would like to align my career more with my life's goals. It is not my aspiration to be a temp for an investment firm for the rest of my working days. I would like to create a job for myself that fits me better and uses the good things I have to offer the world in a more direct way. Who knows!? Maybe I'll open a waffle shop in Buffalo. Or I'll write a cookbook! Only time will tell! Have a happy new year, folks! May this one bring you what you're wishing for.

Kim

Les Gaufre

Waffles. Delicious, crusty, light-as-air, warm Bruxelles waffles. There is a little nook of a shop in a tiny corner of Salt Lake City, UT called "Bruge." It is run by a man named Pierre (of course), and it is named after his home town in Belgium. They sell traditional Belgian waffles, both Bruxelles style and Liège style. They also sell home made Pomme Frites (French Fries) with your choice of homemade mayonaise to dip them in. Unfortunately, I discovered this little gem right before I moved away from Salt Lake, and now I can only long for it from afar. In an attempt to satisfy my waffle cravings, I have become obsessed with finding a recipe to re-create these waffles. I've tried several, and I have finally found one that does a pretty good job of imitating the Bruxelles style waffle.

I can't help but think, though, that I'm not the only one who would be under the spell of these waffles if they only had the chance to taste them. I want to bring authentic Belgian waffles to the world! I swear, if I could figure out a way to do that, I would be a millionaire.

You see, Bruxelles waffles are not like any waffle you have ever tasted in the U.S. They are inclredibly crispy while at the same time having a delicate tender flake on the inside and big fluffy puffs of air throughout making it terribly light and easy to devour. Not only that, but true Bruxelles waffles are made with yeast which also gives it that wonderful yeast-y flavor you would get from a hot buttered roll or a doughnut. Add fresh whipped cream and strawberries, and these waffles are the bomb, to say the least.

The Liège waffles are a whole different animal altogether. While they still have that yeast-y quality, they are much more dense, as though someone took a handful of dinner roll dough and placed it on the waffle iron. But, instead of just plain delicous buttery dinner roll, they have tossed in handfuls of this special sugar called "pearl sugar." It's sugar that's, well, about the size of a pearl. They stir it into the dough - not batter, dough - they stir it into the dough, and because it's so large it doesn't dissolve. The ensuing reaction with the sugar and the hot waffle iron is a delicious gooey mess. The heat of the iron melts the sugar, leaving you with little carmelized pockets of sugar throughout your dense yeasty waffle.

In Belgium, (so I hear. I've never been there.) they, then, sprinkle them, either kind - Bruxelles or Liège - with powdered sugar and you eat it right out of your hand on a piece of pastry paper. It is traditionally eaten as a dessert-y street food, not for breakfast as we do here in America. Although, the thought of one of them with a mimosa and some bacon on the side is kind of making my mouth water.

There is no place to get these waffles in all of Los Angeles. What is a girl to do, but open a waffle shop?! I promise you if I presented these to the people of Los Angeles, there would be a demand for them. Pierre is from Belgium. He uses his Belgian grandmother's family recipe. How can I compete with that? Well, I shall find a way. I just gotta make the waffles.

You Should Write.

That's what someone told me when I started writing long-winded notes on Facebook. Today was the third time I have heard that bit of advice, so I figured it was time to listen.

I have never fancied myself a writer. I've always considered myself more of a math girl, to be honest. I got consistently good grades in math in school (A's & B's). In English, I always struggled (C's). I liked the clear difinitive answers that math could bring me. English was always ambiguous and subject to interpretation. Plus, there is a kind of practicality in math that I liked. English, being a liberal art, always seemed more on the frivilous side of things, like lace or hot rollers. Sometimes they're nice, but most of the time you don't need them. Math you really need on a daily basis. I think there was a connection to my love of dance and music that drew me to math, as well. They say math is very closely related to music in the brain. Dance is very geometrical, and actually uses numbers quite a bit. If you have 10 dancers on the stage and you need to make a triangle with the star dancer at the point in the front & center, how many rows will you have? And how many dancers will be in each row? See what I mean? Math is practical when you are a dancer.

For many years I did not feel that I could define myself as "A Writer" because I got C's in English in school. I completely judged my talent and ability on my grades. Then, a few years ago I got a job working for the Juvenile Court in Utah. In this job, I had occassion to draft legal documents. This was pretty intimidating at first. I mean, a judge was going to be signing this piece of paper and making it the order of the court! This document was going to change the course of someone's life! But I found that being clear and concise, like you are in geometry proofs, was a very good example of how to write these kinds of things. Also, just using basic common sense helped a lot, too. And the judge actually signed them. It was amazing. I was actually kind of a writer! It felt like I was tricking everyone.

Then, Facebook appeared on the horizon, and now anybody and everybody expresses their opinions to the world. Why not me too? Turns out that when I get to just write whatever the hell I want, I can be pretty funny and clever. I mean, sometimes I'm funny and clever. On good days, when the stars are aligned right. You see, I have always been blessed to have at least one or two very close friends around me that are absolutely hilarious. When you surround yourself with witty, entertaining people it keeps you on your toes. Keeps you thinking fast, it's endless fun, and I think their brilliance rubs off on you a little bit.

So, here I am, ready to write. I hope you enjoy what I have to say. You undoubtedly will get to know my inner circle, The Boyfriend, Caleb and his son, Max, my good friends Christie and Kirt, and the various homeless people that live in my house here in Los Angeles.

A La Prochaine!

Kim